Drive Awesome

I like action movies. I (specifically) like 80s action movies (see much earlier posts). I also really like Christina Hendricks (for obvious reasons).


So then, it's no surprise just how much I enjoyed the uber-violent, uber-cool "Drive". Outstanding performances from Ryan Gosling and Albert Brookes and smatterings of extreme bloody violence made for a wonderful romantic evening with my wife.


That's how I roll.

Artistic Merit

I didn't want to like The Artist as much as I did, largely because everyone went on about how good it was.


Annoyingly, it completely won me over. It's just as brilliant as everyone says.


Damnit.

Feeling Husk

When you need a mediocre generic horror movie, and you can't find "Jeepers Creepers" anywhere. Check out Husk. Low on budget, low on scares, but it's watchable if you'rea horror fan.

Which, I am. Naturally.

Three Ami(Ran)gos

Watched Rango the other night. After a slow start, i really ended up getting into it, not least because of some great voice acting by Johnny Depp and Bill Nighy.


Not really sure who it was aimed at though as the animation really jarred with me (at first) and a lot of the jokes (and the plot) probably wouldn't make sense to young children. But maybe I'm not being fair to them.


The really interesting thing is that the thrust of the plot is pretty much the same as the Three Amigos (one of  my favourite comedies ever), which has already been copied by Galaxy Quest (which is also brilliant).


Once the story was underway and it became clear that was where they were going with it, I actually got more involved. Maybe I'm just a sucker for a underdog-pretends-to-be-hero-gets-found-out-leaves-in-shame-returns-to-save-the-day story.

Happy anniversary

So for our anniversary, I took my wife to see two films at the cinema. Sherlock Holmes 2 and The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Which effectively breaks down as scenes of homoeroticism and scenes of anal rape.

How romantic.

I touched on SH2 yesterday, so won't cover that again. With regards, to TGWTDT, I'm a big fan of the books and have seen the original Swedish version. How did this compare? Well, for one Fincher is a masterful director. The film is clearly set up to be part of a trilogy, hence he makes more of Berger than the Swedish version did, and she's much more important in later books. It's a long film, but I never once checked my watch, which suggests that I was gripped throughout.

I'm not sure if I would have got as much out of it if I hadn't read the books, but obviously that's difficult for me to judge.

Overall, worth a watch, if you can get past the (frankly harrowing) rape scenes and the weird fetish James Bond-esque credits.  

The Shadow Game

So, "Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows".


It's billed as being bigger, better, louder than the first film. It's certainly louder.


Now I'm a big fan of the first Sherlock Holmes not least because:
a) Robert Downey-Jr is brilliant
b) It's the only film where I don't want to punch Jude Law in the face (including films he's not in)
c) It's was a remarkable return to form for Guy Ritchie, who, despite what anyone says, made some good films. "Lock, Stock" is great - it just fell apart when he got to "Revolver". And the less said about "Swept Away" the better


Anyway, SH2 didn't disappoint. I didn't think it was as good as the first, but it did have the welcome addition of Stephen Fry as Mycroft. 


Cons: Lestrad wasn't in it enough. Noomi Rapace was completely underused.
Pros: Jared Harris made an excellent Moriarty. And there was lots of camp banter between Holmes and Watson, which was thoroughly entertaining. The "fight" scene at the end was also very well done. 


All in all, a fun popcorn film and a worthy sequel.

Elf Help

Went to see Arthur Christmas the other night, purely because the missus and I were both feeling festive.


It's great fun with a solid voice cast including Bill Nighy, James MacAvoy, Hugh Laurie and Jim Broadbent. The plot revolves around the titular Arthur's quest to bring a present to a little girl who has somehow been missed off of the Christmas Eve present run. Of course, hilarity ensues and all the characters learn some valuable life lessons...


It really is a Christmas film and may not be to everyone's taste but I thoroughly enjoyed it. As I may have mentioned once or twice before, I'm partial to all things Christmas so this was right up my street and left me with a warm glow afterwards.


Family friendly festive fun...

Hindsight is 20/20

In hindsight, after sleeping on it and thinking it over, was I being too harsh on The Dilemma in yesterday's review?

No.

The only Dilemma is how quickly to turn it off

I watch a LOT of films. If you know me personally or through reading this blog, you know that already. And in most cases, even if I'm really not enjoying a film, I'll watch it to the end.


So. The Dilemma. Short story: I didn't make it to the end. 


It's a comedy-drama that neither funny nor especially dramatic. My best friend's wife is cheating on him HA HA HA! It's hilarious. I've been stung by a poisonous plant, so now it's painful to pee - HAHAHAHAHA!  


I got about 40 minutes in before I had to stop. What's even worse is that it's a Ron Howard film, so he should know what he's doing. It's terribly misjudged, Winona Ryder's voice is so weird she sounds like Gizmo from Gremlins, and really you would only find this funny if you had been exposed to the Joker's laughing gas or were in the middle of a psychotic break.


Worst film of the year? Possibly.

The American (F**K Yeah)

It's a somewhat bombastic title, for a really slow, underplayed film.


Not to say I didn't enjoy it, but I watched it about three weeks ago and have only just got around to reviewing it.


It stars George Clooney as a hitman, forced to do "one last job" whilst hiding out in a remote part of Italy. Whilst there he befriends a Priest and falls in love with a prostitute (who likes metaphors?) all the while worried that his enemies are closing in on him.


I did actually enjoy this, but it is very slow. If are prepared for a "thinker" rather than lots of explosions then you'll get more out of it. Not to say there's not violence, because there is. Clooney is really good though, it seems like an age since he was only famous for being the attractive Doctor in ER. He's probably one of the best talents in Hollywood now.  

Stoppable

"Unstoppable" is a complete misnomer. It's about a speeding runaway train that's heading towards a populated city centre, and only Denzel Washington and Captain Kirk (Chris Pine) can stop it.

But without spoiling the end, you know that one way or another it has to stop. Ergo, it isn't "Unstoppable".

Grammatical pedantry aside, I enjoyed it more than I expected to. I think Tony Scott is an extremely competent action director and the plot gripped me more than a story where the bad guy is a train should have. Both leads are likeable in their own way, and as the film is on about 90 mins it feels a bit like a 90's throwback, which of course I liked.

Worth a watch if you're bored one evening, but don't go out of your way.

Tin Tin and the Case of the Crushing Disappointment

I had really expected to like Tin Tin, despite the fact I was never really into the comics as a kid. My friends all gave it glowing reviews. I love Spielberg, a by-product of growing up in the eighties. I like most of Peter Jackson's stuff. I think Edgar Wright is a genius and Joe Cornish is hilarious.


Which is why it's such a shame that Tin Tin is thoroughly boring.


And that's the word for it. It's not awful, it's not offensive, it's just boring. At no point was I engaged with the characters or the plot (which was all over the place). Tin Tin himself was incredibly unrelatable. I found the Thompson twins annoying (despite the fact I really like Frost and Pegg). Daniel Craig and Andy Serkis worked, but not enough to save the film.


At one point there's a chase scene through Morocco which is all one intricate and incredibly long shot. I remember thinking "Wow. This is all one shot. Impressive" and then focusing on the camera work rather than the scene unfolding. When you're following the technical side of the film, there's something very wrong with the plot.


I seem to be in the minority with this one, but it just didn't engage me. I'm hoping that Tin Tin's next adventure isn't the Case of the Unnecessary Sequel.

Three Beats Two

The best thing I can say about Paranormal Activity 3, is that it's better than Paranormal Activity 2. Although, let's be honest the bar was really low.


As a stand alone film, I really enjoyed the first Paranormal Activity. It reminded me a lot of The Blair Witch Project, it was low budget, and anyone who shares a bed with someone will get just how creepy the idea of someone standing over you for four hours while you sleep really is.


Much like Saw however (again, a film I really liked), the sequels really detract from the original. In PA3, the younger versions of the female protagonists from PA1 and PA2 are experiencing more supernatural occurrences. Why they don't remember this or reference it in the first two films however is anyone's guess.


Apparently, PA3 did huge business in the States, so expect a PA4 next Halloween. 

Travolta Fail

So after years and years of hearing it was the worst film ever, I finally saw "Battlefield Earth".


I'm not even going to joke about it too much, as it just made me feel dirty. My friend assures me the book is better, but I'll be damned if I'm going to read it now. 


As bad films go, it's nowhere near as brilliant as "The Room". Frankly, I was bored.


Although perhaps the reason the aliens aren't intimidating is because they're supposed to be giants but just end up looking like really tall drag-queens. Not that drag queens can't be intimidating, but John Travolta as a drag queen can't be intimidating.


Just saying.

It pays to be original

"Tucker and Dale vs Evil" is one of the most original films in a long time, and awesome for it. In the same way that "Shaun of the Dead" posed the question: What would normal London layabouts do in the face of a zombie outbreak? Tucker and Dale asks: What if the villainous hillbillies from slasher movies weren't villainous at all.

And so you have the eponymous Tucker and Dale, two likable red necks who have invested in a dilapidated holiday home, which to them looks like a fixer upper but to the "normal" college students who they run into, looks like Satan's playground.

The mistaken identity continues when the skinny chick from 30 Rock (Katrina Bowden) nearly drowns and Dale (Tyler Labine - the chubby one from Reaper) and Tucker (Alan Tudyk - Wash from Firefly and Pirate Steve from Dodgeball) rescue her. Her idiot friends think that the hillbillies have kidnapped her, and try to stage a rescue, but due to a series of accidents all end up deader than Mel Gibson's career. And this, of course, only makes Tucker and Dale look more evil...

It's a lot of fun, and the escalating death scenes of the college kids pan out like a Final Destination that's played for laughs. The cast are great, and it's nice that although the stars are all recognisable, they're all C-List giving the whole thing more credibility. The film works by inverting the traditional horror conventions, whilst keeping some entertaining scares, some over-the-top gore and lots of laughs.

The perfect example that with a strong central conceit and a good cast you can make a decent movie on a low budget.

Benefits with Friends

I really didn't expect to like "Friends with Benefits", primarily because going into it I feared it would follow all the cinematic cliches in the book for Rom-Coms. Then, once it started, I thought that there might be some hope yet...

Justin Timblerlake and Mila Kunis are friends who decide to see if they can have a sexual relationship without it getting in the way of their friendship. Things get complicated, feelings get involved, blah, blah, blah.

The film starts strongly (with Andy Samberg and Emma Stone making neat little cameos dumping Kunis and Timberlake) and for perhaps the first hour, there was lots of laughs and I thought that the film might do something original and defy convention. At one point Kunis is screaming at a Katherine Hiegl poster, berating it for lying to her about true love. And if the whole film had kept that tone, it would definitely have been edgier and may even have been exceptional.

But this is Hollywood, so of course it then needed to fall in line with rom-com conventions. And once that started happening the film got boring, the laughter stopped and I got sorely disappointed.

Good start, poor end.

Bad Horror Movies

So on Saturday, I ended up watching some bad horror movies with some friends. The highlight being "Night of the Demons", starring Shannon Elizabeth and Edward Furlong.


Needless to say it was badly acted, poorly scripted and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Edward Furlong has not aged well since T2 though.


But hey, it's not Hallowe'en without a bad horror movie, right?

Red Alert

I'm a massive Kevin Smith fan. I love the View Askewniverse, I modelled my retail career on the film Clerks, I love his comic books ("Quiver" was what made Green Arrow relevant again) and I've even seen him live.


Which is why his last few films have been a bit of a disappointment. Jersey Girl was too bland, Clerks 2 was rehashing old ground (but I liked the old ground so I didn't mind that much) and Cop Out was just a bit dull (but he didn't write it so no wonder).

So it is with great delight that I can report on just how much I enjoyed Red State. A complete departure from Smith's earlier work, it's edgy (by God is it edgy), it keeps you guessing and has some genuinely uncomfortable moments.

I won't reveal too much about the plot, beyond the fact it's being marketed as a horror - which is somewhat misleading as I'm not sure that I could pin it down to any one (or five) genres. John Goodman is brilliant as always and Melissa Leo (who's clearly in everything now) is squirm-inducingly excellent.

A thoroughly gripping watch which proves that Smith can be versatile as a director. Like Clerks was, it's edgy, but in an entirely different way. Smith seems to do his best work when he sticks to his indie roots. 

More of this please Kevin.

Your number’s up

It says something about “What’s Your Number” that I saw it two weeks ago and am only just posting the review.

Riding on the post-Bridesmaids wave of female led comedy, this rom-com sees Ana Faris realise that after having slept with 20 guys she now falls into a magazine’s bracket of women who will never get married. Through a fairly contrived set of circumstances she teams up with Chris Evans (not being Captain America this time) to try and track down her all of her exes in the hopes that one will now be right for her.

It’s a shame that this was filmed before Bridesmaids and released after it, as they both have the same joke in the opening scene. And the comparisons to Bridesmaids (which I have reviewed before) don’t stop there. As with Bridesmaids there are some funny moments (though not as many) and the film falls apart in the last thirty minutes. Maybe it’s because that’s when it goes down the rom-com cliché, but as with Bridesmaids the ending left me cold.

Chris Evans is largely there for women to look at, but I won’t complain as Ana Faris (who is quirkily attractive) runs around in her underwear for a lot of the film. Evans doesn’t do much, and the numerous comedy cameos as Faris’ exes don’t last long enough. The real star is of course Faris, who once again proves her comedy chops, and shows herself to be an extremely good physical comedienne – which is no mean feat.

I found the cop out ending a bit too convenient, and it almost washed over the moral that people should love you for who you are. All in all it’s not terrible, it’s not great but it’s better than expected.

Red Riding Hood 2

Further to my notes on “Red Riding Hood” yesterday, I’d also like to highlight the crushing disappointment of seeing Gary Oldman (my pick for this year’s BAFTA for Best Actor) stooping to such lows after the highs of “Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy” - in my mind one of the best films of the year. Hey, I guess everyone’s got to pay the mortgage.

Also, I find Amanda Seyfried kinda weird to look at. She has fish eyes.

Just Saying.