Unprofessional Environment

So my office seems to be an increasingly geeky place to work, which can only be a good thing.


The white board by our printer has somehow become the place to post existential comments, which lately has evolved into complete geekdom, with a drawing of a Flux Capacitor (I'm convinced that's what it is), along with the comment "It's what makes time travel possible").


There are also random quotes from Adam and Joe, including "Why be Denny Different" and "Maybe you shouldn't be printing HERE!" - a direct riff on  Pierce Brosnan in "Taffin".


Maybe I've just got Graduation Goggles on (esoteric HIMYM reference), but all in all, if I end up leaving soon I think I'll be sad to go.

The pants party

Saturday night involved an immense steak meal for my wife's 30th with a number of our nearest and dearest.


As part of the celebration I cracked out my Back to the Future pants, along with a jeans, waistcoat and tie combo that combined with my blonde spiky hair made me look like a guitarist with a nu-metal band. As my friend Jake had almost an identical outfit (sans the blonde spiky hair), we also looked like we'd stepped out of the same page of the Next catalogue.


I found out afterwards that someone else was also rocking the BttF pants. It was a girl, and I won't tell you who.


All in all my friends are pretty damn awesome.

Tween Wolf

So I’ve now been ‘lucky’ enough to watch the pilot episode of the Teen Wolf reboot. You may remember that when I was bemoaning reboots a few weeks ago, I said I was particularly dubious about this one, but I was willing to give it a chance.

More fool me.

Someone has taken the 1985 classic that I loved from my childhood, and Stephanie Meyered it beyond all recognition. They play Lacrosse not Basketball, for crying out loud! When did Lacrosse stop being a middle-class girl’s game?

I’m not going to rant about it, I’m too despondent. If you’re thinking to yourself “It can’t be THAT bad”, imagine this:

Teen Wolf (1985) goes to a bar. It’s 26 years old now, and is comfortable drinking alone. I mean, it’s never had the success of “Back to the Future”, but as Michael J Fox vehicles go, it’s up there. So imagine it’s surprise when Twilight sidles over to it at the bar. At first, Teen Wolf scoffs at the bad poetry and broody looks that Twilight is sending it’s way, but before it knows what’s happening, Teen Wolf is brushing it’s hair behind it’s ears and beginning to think that Twilight is pretty deep. “Why don’t I let Twilight buy me a drink?” it thinks to itself, “What could be the harm?”

One Rohypnol Margarita later, and Twilight is leading a groggy Teen Wolf back to it’s van. Teen Wolf doesn’t like where this is going, but is too out of it to argue. Before Teen Wolf knows what’s happening, it’s being led into Twilight’s house, and down into Twilight’s basement. Before Teen Wolf blacks out, it sees chains on the wall...this place has been turned in to some kind of dungeon.

Fast-forward nine months. Word can’t express the depravity that Teen Wolf has suffered at the hands of Twilight. At first, Teen Wolf had cried itself to sleep, wishing that this was all a bad dream, hoping that the team from “Criminal Minds” would swoop in at some point to rescue it from this hell. But it never happened. Instead, through the months of abuse, Teen Wolf develops Stockholm Syndrome and begins to think that Twilight really loves it. “Twilight is only doing what’s best for me.” “Twilight really loves me.” “I’m pregnant with Twilight’s baby, and we’ll raise it together.”

Until Twilight doesn’t need the chains anymore. Teen Wolf is so compliant, so brainwashed, that it’ll do anything Twilight says. And that’s when Teen Wolf gives birth to the bastard child of this unholy union. And Twilight says, “let’s raise the baby my way”. A part of Teen Wolf wants to argue. A part of Teen Wolf knows this is wrong. But that part of Teen Wolf can’t find the strength to speak up. But Twilight is clever and knows that part of Teen Wolf is still there, so in order to get it’s own way, Twilight suggests a compromise...

“We’ll raise the baby my way, but we’ll let it keep your name.”

Wow, that got a little darker than I intended. But, you know, you can’t hide from the truth.

The original is not still the best

With the sheer volume of sequels, prequels, remakes and adaptations that seem to be hitting our screens lately, there doesn’t seem to be much room in Hollywood for original ideas. With the notable exception of “Inception”, it’s difficult to think of a mainstream “big” movie that came out last year that wasn’t a sequel, an adaptation or based on factual historical events.

But is it due to a stunning lack of original thought in Hollywood, or is it just because an adaptation or sequel already has a built in audience so studios see it as less risky?

It’s not to say that these types of films can’t be excellent. Discounting “The King’s Speech” (as it was based on actual historical events), look at some of this year’s biggest films: “The Social Network” (based on a book), “Toy Story 3” (a sequel, or threequel if you’re an idiot) and “True Grit” (based on a film or a book depending on who you ask). Some of my personal favourites from last year included “Shutter Island” (based on a book), “Scott Pilgrim vs the World” (based on a comic) and the excellent “Kick Ass” (based on a comic).

This year we’ve got a whole heap of unnecessary sequels – “Fast and Furious 5” (or “Fast Five” if you think it’s cooler), “Scream 4” and “The 5nal Destination” (yes, that’s right, they’ve put a five at the front, how clever. Just be glad they didn’t do that with the last one, or it would have attracted a whole different audience…think about it). There’s also four big comic book movies (which is great for a geek like me), in the form of “The Green Lantern”, “Thor”, “X-men: First Class” and “Captain America”. But where’s the next big original idea?

I think that it’s because of this market place that’s so saturated with recycled ideas, that when something as original as “Inception” comes along it really stands out. We’ve reached the point where a series as popular as the hateful Twilight saga or the outstanding Millennium trilogy comes along, studios pounce on the idea of adapting them for the screen. The Millennium trilogy has been made in it’s original language as well as the coming US remake. Studios are so keen to cash in on the ongoing success of the Harry Potter franchise that they’ll jump on anything remotely resembling family friendly book to film adaptations. See the woeful “The Golden Compass”, “Percy Jackson and the Lightening Thief” and “I am Number Four” (which the studio gobbled up on the promise of a six-book series, even though only one has been written).

It’s a sad state of affairs, because I truly believe it stifles the creativity of filmmakers. Surely the film going public is smart enough not to discount a film from the start just because they haven’t read the book/seen the first one? The only good thing (arguably) that comes out of this onslaught of adaptations is that it puts books in front of people who wouldn’t normally read them.

I don’t want to sound like a pessimist, but the best film I saw at the cinema last year was “Back to the Future” on it’s 25^th anniversary release. Obviously I’m not entirely subjective as that was a childhood favourite, but they just don’t seem to make them like that anymore, and I think the fact studios are so hesitant to produce original films in more than partly to blame.

You never know, perhaps in 25 years, I’ll watch the re-release of “Fast and Furious 5” and I’ll complain that they ‘don’t make them like that anymore’.

But I doubt it.